This Heart of Mine
by merrow
Summary: How Ayame met Mine and what it did to him.


"So you remember, what we talked about?"

"Of course, Gure!!" Ayame preened, pushing his hair back over his shoulders. "Don't you think you're over-reacting just a bit. I mean, it's sweet, your concern for me..."

"Aya, I don't know what I'd do if something happened to you." Shigure pouted, twisting his hands together like a young maiden and fluttering his lashes at his cousin.

"Gure, my heart-"

"Stop it, you two." Hatori sighed. "Now isn't the time for this. Shigure, don't pull that in there. Akito has been more unstable then usual lately." Hatori straightened his formal kimono, looking uncomfortable. "Ayame, didn't we tell you to dress up?"

Ayame looked down at his neatly pressed high school uniform. "This isn't good enough? I can go get my student council robe."

"No!" Hatori looked at him like he'd lost his mind. "Haven't you been listening? If you have any hope of getting Akito to grant your request to go to college-"

The white haired teen crossed his arms, "I don't see what our glorious head has to say about it. Akito is just a child, it will be years before anything "our god" has to say counts."

"Haven't you been paying attention to anything that's happening around here? Ever since Akira's death, Akito has been... not right." Hatori looked disturbed. "You'd think with how it's affected your brother-"

"I haven't seen him in months." Ayame shrugged, "It's not like he says anything when I do see him. He just sits there like a lump."

"That's the problem!" Hatori snapped, "He's talking less and less to everyone. Ever since-" The troubled teen brushed his bangs out of his face and his murky green eyes. "Look, it wouldn't hurt you to go visit him once and a while."

"I'd die of boredom, surely." Ayame said flippantly, turning so he wouldn't have to meet Hatori's eyes. "How do we always end up talking about him anyway? Besides, this all very easy. Akito has already agreed to let you go to medical school-"

"That's only because we need a doctor!" Hatori said, "It's not like I would have gotten permission if I wanted to go to... I don't know, get some other kind of degree. And besides, I only got permission to go to a place I can commute to, I'm not to leave the honke."

"I asked months ago to go," Shigure broke in. "I still haven't gotten an answer. If you go, I probably won't." He said it matter-of-factly. "I don't think we'd all be able to go."

"Gure," Ayame started, looking upset.

"Don't worry about it," Shigure said waving a careless hand. "I can write no matter what I am, and Akito won't stop me from going to someplace within walking distance, and there are at least three or four places I can go to." He grinned at Hatori and slung an arm over his shoulder. "You know, your school has a social sciences track maybe I'll follow you there."

"Please don't." Hatori said flatly.

"Ha-san, so cruel!"

"Akito-sama will see you now." A faceless servant bowed holding the door open.

Hatori and Shigure quickly flanked Ayame, one on each side.

"Now remember-" Shigure started, finally giving into nerves and straightening his kimono.

"No talking!" Hatori finished, brushing his hair out of his eyes.

Ayame made a motion like zipping his lips and followed one step behind as the other two entered.

::0::0::

They'd tried to prepare him, everyone had told him, but the reality was nothing he'd been prepared for. Akito has sat reclining on a cushion like a prince out of a fairy tale. The windows were all shuttered and it was hard to make out anything other then the childish head's big eyes in the darkness. Sitting like a pet at Akito's feet was Yuki. His eyes widened when he saw Ayame come in. He straightened from the huddle he was in and started to get up. Akito shot him a glance and he seemed to collapse back into himself. Yuki wrapped his arms around his legs, hunched his shoulders and just stared at his older brother.

Ayame had kneeled with Shigure and Hatori on the provided cushions. He'd listened while his cousins pleaded his case, trying to convince Akito to let him go to fashion design school, one that required him to live off the honke complex, one with a dorm. Ayame kept his head down and his mouth shut. Hatori explained it was the nearest school that had the courses Ayame was interested in. Shigure pointed out that as an elite Souma it was only to be expected that Ayame go to one of the best schools in his field of interest, and this was it.

"Ayame." Akito said finally, drawing the snake's eyes up. "Why do you want to leave me?" Akito's large eyes where brimming with tears. "Do you hate me that much?" Yuki flinched when the young leader grabbed up a pillow and threw it at the trio. "You all just want to go and leave me behind." Yuki crawled off to a corner.

"Akito." Shigure stood and approached his young god. "I'm, we're, not going anywhere. We aren't leaving you."

"He wants to!" Akito pouted, pointing at Ayame and twisting thin hands in Shigure's kimono. "Hatori is going too, and you want to!"

"Akito-sama," Hatori said from his cushion, "I'll only be attending classes, like I do now. I'll still be here with you."

"And I'll be here with you too." Shigure said petting Akito. "I'm not going anywhere, ever, I promise."

"But you asked." Akito snuffled, burrowing into Shigure's kimono, trying to wrap small arms around Shigure's waist. "You asked too."

"I only want to take classes. I won't leave." Shigure looked apologetically at Ayame. "Besides, Akito-sama, do you really want Ayame around? He's so noisy."

"And stupid." Akito's face changed to a mask of anger. "You're a baka! A baka! I don't like you, and I don't want you here! Go to your stupid school! See if I care!"

"Thank you, Akito-sama!" Hatori said and tugged on Ayame's arm.

"Thank you, Akito-sama." Ayame repeated and followed Hatori out. He glanced at Shigure, but the dog just shook his head and continued to pet Akito's hair gently. Yuki stayed huddled in the corner, forgotten.

Now the snake stood in the garden, outside Akito's home, trying to keep his hands from shaking. "Deep breaths," he thought to himself, looking at the pond. "Deep breaths."

"We told you-" Hatori said, standing to the side. "I'm sorry, now isn't the time... but.. you see what's been happening."

"What happened?" Ayame said, placing long fingers over his heart. "My heart is thudding. It hurt so much..."

"Akito is our god." Shigure said simply, his kimono disheveled as he finally followed them out. "Of course it hurts when our god is unhappy." He gave Ayame a long look. "Imagine what it's like for Yuki being around that all the-"

"Not now, Gure!" Ayame said flipping his hair back and turning away from him. "Can't you see I'm upset enough?"

Shigure threw his hands up. "Whatever. Your welcome, by the way." Shigure stomped off.

"Gure..." Ayame said pleadingly to his back. "Thank you... I do mean it."

Shigure looked over his shoulder, "You better just be the best you are at what you do. I won't forgive you otherwise."

Hatori looked at his watch. "My tutor will be here soon. I've got to go, Father will be furious if he finds out about this."

"Thanks for your help too, Tori." Ayame said.

"Isn't your mother going to protest?" Hatori asked. "I mean, when we were kids she used to say-"

"She's given up on this stupid son." Ayame grinned bowing a little. "She'll be glad when I'm out of the house."

"You say that like you're proud of it." Hatori sighed. He glanced at his watch again. "I'll talk to you later, dinner at Shigure's?"

"See you there." Ayame leaned against a tree and nodded as Hatori left. He heard a rustling behind him. He sighed and looked a little more interested in his reflection in the pond. He played with the ends of his hair. It was starting to get longer, he could make a little braid now. He glanced out of the corner of his eye. His little brother was still there.

Ayame looked away from Yuki turning to leave. He'd only just won his freedom from the honke, and it'd be months before he'd be able to claim it. He wasn't going to ruin it by making Akito mad over the head's little pet. All he needed was for the young god to look out the window and see him talking to Yuki and it would be all over.

He heard sandals slapping at the grass and felt a small hand grab at his sleeve.

Pretending not to notice, he shifted his elbow and quickened his pace. He heard Yuki fall back, but the boy didn't call out. Ayame didn't look back and didn't give it another thought.

::0::0::0::

"Listen Souma, I know you think you're God's gift to Fashion, but not all of us agree-"

"Au contrare!" Ayame flipped his long thick braid back over his shoulder, "I'm not merely God's gift to Fashion, but to Romance and the ideals of LOVE and Desire! I encompass all of these things!!"

"You encompass a crock of-"

"Problems?" The professor appeared by the side of the long workbench. He sighed. Of course there were problems, it was a class with Ayame Souma in it.

"Yes! I can't work with him!" The other student slammed a hand flat against the desk. "He's completely ignoring the assignment!"

The professor quirked an eyebrow at Ayame, "Do you have a problem with the assignment, Souma-san?"

"None what-so-ever!" Ayame grinned. "I already have 15 designs."

"I only asked for 5 designs for everyday fashions for women in their late 30's to 40's."

"Of course I will refine these varied imaginings of my heart to 5 pure and perfect designs." Ayame said self-confidently. "But as this is supposed to be a project done in pairs, I felt I should consult with my

partner first."

"Pure? Pure!" The other student stood. "He designed fetish-wear! For _Moms!_" He pulled out his own portfolio, "And he won't even consider looking at my designs-"

"Of course not." Ayame scoffed. "Yours lack imagination and courage." He stood, planting both hands on the desk and looked down at the other student. "Where is your love? Your passion! You must love your subjects before you can design for them!"

"Let me see your designs." The professor sighed. Fetish-wear for moms? Only Ayame...

Ayame handed him his portfolio, and sat back self assured.

The professor's brow furrowed. "What is your concept for this line?"

"The Ideal of Motherhood." The words rolled off his tongue. "At that age, of course they would be mothers."

"And how exactly is this an 'ideal of motherhood'?" The professor held up a design sketch of a woman, all in black, her hair upswept in a severe hairdo. Her outfit was a fitted suit, low cut jacket with no blouse underneath. In one hand she held a ruler.

"Mother the Disciplinarian." Ayame nodded, "That needs work, it's missing something... perhaps... higher heels."

"And this one?" You could hear the sigh in the professors voice.

Ayame looked at the sketch, this one a woman with a flouncy apron and not much else. She held a ladle in one hand and her hair was in curls. "Mother the cook."

"Is she wearing anything under that apron?" The professor asked severely.

"That is what is fun to find out. " Ayame grinned. "A salaryman, coming home after a long day, is met in the kitchen by his loving wife. He unwraps her from her apron, hungry-"

"Enough with your sick fantasies!" The other student turned to the professor, "I can't work with him, it's romance this and undress that! Please, Sensei, I've tried but..."

"Understood, I'll find you a new partner Kuno. Wait for me in my office."

"Thank you Sensei!" The young man smiled.

"Souma."

"Yes, Kanzaki-Sensei?" Ayame reclined back in his seat, closing his eyes and pondering the lack of staying power of the average art student. That was the fourth partner he'd gone through in this class alone.

Professor Kanzaki stared at him hard. Most students would be squirming, but Ayame calmly opened one golden eye to regard him. "You'll finish this assignment on your own." He paused. "Again."

Ayame gave a slight smile and nodded. Four assignments, four partners, four assignments he'd ended up working on alone. Not quite alone, Shigure and Hatori had come and helped him finish construction on some of them. Hatori had gotten quite good at hand stitching since starting medical school. He gave a little grin remembering how Shigure had gotten himself covered in glitter and sequins while attempting to help him embellish one dress.

"Do you find this amusing?" His professor asked sternly. "This will effect your grade!"

"No, Sensei." Ayame sighed. "I find it very tiring." He leaned forward on the workbench idly ruffling the edges of his designs. He'd have to simplify them again if Hatori and Shigure where going to help him construct them.

"Ayame, are you an only child?" Kanzaki asked suddenly and was rewarded by seeing his unflappable student flinch.

"No, I have a younger brother. Much younger." Ayame said flatly. "There is..." he paused as if counting. "an eleven year difference between the two of us. We are not close." He glared at his professor. "Why?"

Surprised by the amount of venom a mere mention of his younger brother caused, the professor paused before answering. "You don't seem to have a good foundation on working with others." Ayame's golden eyes could be quite startling even when they weren't looking at you like they were imagining crushing you underfoot. Kanzaki swallowed before continuing. "You have to compromise and meet people half-way in order to work happily with them. You can't expect to work alone your whole life."

"Yes, Sensei." Ayame said and stood, gathering his things together. "If there is anything else...?"

"Not at the moment." The professor sighed. Ayame was possibly one of his most talented students. But sadly, if he didn't learn that talent wasn't all it took to succeed he wouldn't go far.

Ayame nodded stiffly and left the classroom.

::0::0::

"Weren't you supposed to have a partner for this project?"

Ayame sighed again, dramatically and with a lot of air. "Yes, but he couldn't understand my artistic vision." His hand tightened on the phone. "Can't you come over for just a little bit?"

"Aya, my love, my heart," Shigure said sweetly over the phone. "I have homework too, and I can't get someone else to write my essays." He paused, "Well I could, but I actually like this topic. Ha-san said no?"

"He's got a test tomorrow." Ayame pouted. "He said he'd come this weekend, if Akito let him." He reflected again that he needed to get a cellphone. He hated having to talk to his cousins on a public phone in the dorm lounge. He leaned against the wall and tried to ignore the other students sitting about the room.

"I wouldn't count on it." Shigure said seriously. "Ren's been all over him lately so I doubt Akito will let him out of the honke."

"Stupid Ren." Ayame huffed, picking nervously at his sleeve. If Ren was causing trouble it was likely that neither Hatori or Shigure would be allowed out to visit him. How was he going to finish everything all by himself?

"Yuki's suffering the most because of it." Shigure sounded tired. "Akito locked him up again, and wouldn't even let him out after he started having an attack. Hatori had to go get his father to demand that he be let to take him to the hospital. He's still there, you know."

"Is he?" Ayame said. "Thats the real reason Hatori can't leave, he stood up against our God, and Akito needs a new pet. I wish Yuki'd hurry up and get better." He grinned at a student who'd stopped and stared. Let him make what he will out of it, no one ever took what he said seriously anyway.

"That's the first time I've ever heard you say something nice towards your brother." Shigure sounded disbelieving.

"Well if he got better then Akito wouldn't cling to you two so much." Ayame said, chewing at his lip. "What am I going to do? I simplified the designs as much as I could, I'm never going to be able to finish these all on my own!"

"Stop pissing off your partners then."

"Gure." Ayame whined. "Don't be mean."

Shigure sighed, "I'll see what I can do... I'll try to finish my paper tonight, maybe I can come over for a little tomorrow. I definitely can't stay over, but we can try to get as much done as possible. Why don't you call Ritsu? Akito doesn't care where he goes, and I heard he'd been making his own clothes lately. Or Kagura even? She said she wants to learn to sew."

The snake sat heavily on the floor under the dorm communal phone. "Ritsu...I hadn't thought about him, will his mother let him travel this far? He's only 14. Kagura-chan couldn't come by herself either, her mother wouldn't allow it. I don't know how much use she'd be."

"I don't suppose she could be any worse then me. At least she likes arts and crafts." Shigure chuckled. "And Ritsu's at the honke right now, visiting, if they went together I think it would be alright. I'll ask her mother, if I can the three of us will come out tomorrow."

"My dearest, my sweetest," Ayame purred into the phone, "whatever would I do without you? I can't even conceive of it."

"Hope that you never have to, my love." Shigure said suavely.

"Such is the stuff nightmares are made of. I shall have cold sweats tonight, thinking of it." Ayame winked at one of his dorm mates, "Are you sure you can't come over tonight and comfort me?"

"Why don't you come home for once?" Shigure said suddenly serious. "We haven't all eaten together for months. And you should visit your brother in the hospital."

"I don't have time, Gure." Ayame said tiredly. "Just...don't, okay? I'll see you tomorrow?"

"If I can."

"Don't be mad at me, Gure." Ayame begged. "I don't like it when you're mad at me."

"Then stop pissing _me_ off!" Shigure said. Ayame heard the phone move and thought he was going to hung up on. Finally he heard Shigure sigh, "I'll call you tomorrow if I can't come. Bye."

Ayame heard the phone click, but he said "Goodbye, Gure" anyway.

::0::0::

_Wow, this chapter is a lot shorter then I usually write. I'm pretty sure I got Ritsu's age completely wrong. I'm trying something different with this story, and I'm not sure if it's working. Please let me know if anything seems off. At least one person has already told me they thing the premise is pretty unlikely and they think Ayame's OCC. What do you think?_


End file.
